This Great Adventure

I’m often bemused and occasionally amused by the way some people approach travel and adventure. Growing up in south San Diego when my father worked in Tijuana I got used to other cultures and taking things for what they were instead of what I expected.

Am I’m riding on the back of an elephant
F G Am Please forgive any typos you may note
The video I made is still uploading
You’ll have to be content with reading what I wrote
The drive here from the airport was so short
The Jeep’s heated seats barely got warm
No vegan choices at last night’s big buffet
F G C And our tour guide wouldn’t cancel the rainstorm

F G C Never thought when we bought this great adventure
We’d be subjected to conditions like these
Can’t even get a half-caf low-fat cinnamon soy latte
F G Am Don’t think I’m so very hard to please
How do the locals live each day with such indignities?

Our guided tour of the jungle was a bust
My iPod battery died and I was stuck
Listening to the guide drone on and on
About the okkabeest and wildebuck
I tried the WiFi on our flight over the veldt
It’s free but then of course it’s awfully slow
Can’t recommend the side trip’s extra cost
You’ll see it clearer when they make the tv show
chorus

The entire country is redolent of wildlife
Someone should take steps to hide the smell
I’m sure the concierge would make amends
If only I could reach them on my cell
How can one enjoy the blooming sunset
When it’s purple instead of pink and orange?
And now my phone’s battery is dying
I’m afraid I won’t be finishing—